A Study of Fan Fictions
by Vayalin Whisper
Summary: In which Sherlock receives an e-mail from Sally Donovan, discovers fan fiction, meets a girl with glasses and braces, makes the acquaintance of Mary Sue aka Ebony Dark'ness Dementia Raven Way and violently smashes the fourth wall.
1. Sherlock Holmes discovers Fan Fiction

**Disclaimer: Of course I own everything in this story. What, I don't? You just destroyed the world of my dreams.**

„John, were is my gun?" Sherlock was lying on the sofa, bored.

„No, you are not going to shoot the wall again. Why don't you do something productive in your spare time?" John shouted back from the bathroom.

„Productive? Like what?"

„I don't know. Read. Work on your website. Go on the internet and find a case. Or go and buy the goddamn milk!" John sounded more frustrated that he usually did when Sherlock was having a boredom-attack. Broke up with his girlfriend? Stress with Harry, more likely.

„Reading is hardly productive, according to you nobody reads my website, I am a consulting detective which means that people come to me with their cases, I don't go to them and ask for one. As for the milk, why don't you go and buy some yourself, if you need it so desperately?" Sherlock spat back.

„Because I am taking a shower, Sherlock. Which means that I am naked. Which means that I cannot go out and buy some milk." Sherlock could literally see John roll his eyes at him.

„Why not. Would be an excellent social experiment." He didn't get an answer to that. After two minutes of debating whether or not he should break one of Mrs. Hudsons vases, he turned on his computer. Nothing new on his website and only two new e-mails. An invitation to the Police Summer Fayre and an e-mail from Sally Donovan. Subject: Check this out!

Sherlock usually never opened e-mails from Sally but due to his extreme boredom, he told himself, he could make an exception. The e-mail consisted of a link which Sherlock clicked without really thinking about it.

"What, in the name of John pink pants, is that?!" was Sherlock's first reaction. He wasn't bothered to read the whole text but the words Sherlock Holmes and John Watson appeared often enough for him to deduce that the text was about him. It didn't look like a newspaper article though. What was it?

"_It's something called fan fiction, a term that describes creative writing that uses preexisting characters from television, movies, books or other fiction. It is written by fans of the respective series, hence the name."_ a voice in Sherlock head said but it wasn't Sherlock's thinking voice (which, by the way, sounds like Benedict Cumberbatch).

"Who are you?", Sherlock thought back, eager to get in contact with the voice in his head.

"_I am the author of this story and for god's sake, you are completely ruining it by breaking the flow!" _If Sherlock was surprised, he didn't show it. His natural curiosity kicked in and he googled quest-searched "Sherlock Holmes fan fiction". To say the results terrified him would be an understatement. Yes, Sherlock Holmes was terrified.

"Why do people _do_ that?" he thought, in an attempt to communicate with the voice that called itself "author of this story" (At the back of his mind he was wondering if that meant that he was_ in_ a story.)

"_Because it's fun. Come with me and I'll show you some more!" _Before Sherlock could protest he was pulled through a plot hole into the internet.


	2. Sherlock meets Mary Sue

The first thing Sherlock noticed was that he had become flat. Then he noticed the girl next to him, who also seemed to be two-dimensional. She had long blonde hair and magnificent blue eyes. She was short, shorter than even John and was wearing both glasses and braces. About 13 or 14 years old, has a dandruff problem, extremely bad eyes, plays the violin, Sherlock deduced.

"Let's go then, shall we?" she said. He happily noted that her voice wasn't inside his head anymore but actually came from her mouth. She made some weird clicking noises and suddenly they were inside a fan fiction, at least that's what Sherlock assumed because there were words all around him. "I'll introduce you to Mary Sue, also known as Ebony Dark'ness Dementia Raven Way, first. She is an OC, an "original character" wich means she was created by the author of the respective story." Sherlock raised an eyebrow. "Don't worry, she's a lovely girl."

Mary Sue was beautiful. Her fiery red hair hung like waves beside her perfectly shaped face, and her eyes were like sapphires. Or did she have long ebony black hair with purple streaks and red tips that reaches her mid back and icy blue eyes like limpid tears?

Sherlock found himself repelled by her (literally, he flew to the very corner of the computer screen) and was shocked to see that the fan fiction Sherlock was attracted to her.

"That is what we call OOC, which stands for out of character." the girl with the braces and glasses explained. Sherlock Holmes wasn't listening. He had started to read the story and with each word he read his expression got darker.

"I need something to write with. Give me something to write with." he demanded. Luckily the girl with braces and glasses had a virtual notebook and a virtual pen with her which she handed to Sherlock. He immediately started to write down:

**What to remember when creating an OC**

Don't give him/her a ridiculous name. Mine and Myroft's names are already ridiculous enough for this whole fandom.

Don't make him/her stunningly beautiful. Make him/her realistic. Please note: I am not sexually attracted to peope of either gender. There is no need to make them good looking, I will not fall for them anyway.

How many people were abused in their childhood and/or have lost one or both parents? There is no need to give your character a mysterious and tragic past, just so that people pity them.

Flaws. F-L-A-W-S. Humans have flaws. (And vampires have them, too.) They are arrogant, selfish, stupid, shy, crazy, the list goes on and on and on. In order to make your OC believeable and human, give them flaws. (Note: Clumsiness is not a flaw when it can be dubbed cute.

You may ignore those rules if you have a good reason for it ("Noone will fall in love with a fat girl who is called Jenny!" is not a good reason. In fact, it's not even a reason.) Otherwise, for the sake of my sanity, follow these rules.  
Yours sincerly, Sherlock Holmes

Sherlock Holmes gave the list to the girl with the glasses and braces. He looked around. Mary Sue was gone, probably to be really sexy, nice and a tomboy at the same time.

"I think I have finished my work here." he stated. The girl with the glasses and braces (let's call her Bob) shook her head.

"You have not read a Johnlock fanfiction yet." And she made some weird clicking noises again.


End file.
